Questions from an inquisitive youth who's Grandma tells her that her favourite question to ask is 'Why.'

Hello,

I'm not exactly sure how to begin. I almost feel that I should be writing this with a quill and on parchment paper. I don't know you and you don't know me. I have paid your credit card in the bank once but you wouldn't have known that until now. This is going to sound more like an interview than a message to a person who participated in my creation but how do you even begin to write to a person like you whom I have so many questions for but I know that you are not looking for me. You know where I am. You are not curious and you must even have memories of my existence. So here, man with curly hair who I thank for that feature, are my questions. You don't have to reply. I'm not looking for a relationship. You knew where I was if you wanted one and I understand your situation was complicated so don't feel like this is going to set off some terrible spiral of events because these, these are just questions. Questions from an inquisitive youth who's Grandma tells her that her favourite question to ask is 'Why.'

1) Am I in any way foreign, relatives from way back when? I'm bored of being questioned about my origin and not being able to answer.

2) Do I have grandparents? Did they ever want to see me? Would they ever want to meet me... I do like grandparents.

3) Do you read?

4) I would kinda like a brief explanation of why you went, why you left. You don't have to feel like you need to cushion this for me, I'd really rather have the bare facts and reasons if you would.

5) Do you do crosswords?

6) What is your favourite colour?

I think for now that is all, thankyou for my bed when I was 11.

I'm watching Long Lost Families and I suppose my situation is somewhat a bit similar apart from the not being lost part. And that you didn't have to walk over the border into England... That's just happened in the episode i've just watched.

Thanks,

N.

The break up.

Everybody talks about them, people write songs about them, you can even watch them happen at the pictures. However, nobody can really understand the emotional torment of one until they actually endure one. Commence a long mental thought commentary of my curly existence post breakup.

So,
Everyone is all excited about getting together. There's excitement, you make nicknames about them to your friends like 'red jumper boy' or 'Harley' if he owns a motorbike. Harly was mine. Soon shortened to Harlz and that name stuck. That name stuck for a whole year of my life.

It's weird, the break up. At first there is the thought process when you're still together, the constant arguments, the ways of the other person that you don't agree with. So then you decide the only thing to do is break up. You've broken up once. You then got back together. Even went on a boat trip in the lakes with them and still, it's just not working. So then you have to explain to the other person your thoughts on the situation. 'What are you thinking?' - the dreaded question. But I find that everyone takes pity on the one who has been broken up with. Maybe Adele deserved to be dumped. Maybe she was a winger, a jealous type, a 'are you really going to wear that?' kind of human. But you feel sorry for her, well what about the breaker-up-ers? It's still god damn hard for us too. Yes it was our choice. Yes we wanted this to come to an end but, returning to a cold flat, a cold bed, the mental torture of 'did I do the right thing?' is horrific.

Now you have to endure the whole 'well you have my stuff so I need to come over and get it back'. So you have to see them. You have to see the person whose heart you broke. Who's future plans you destroyed and who's going to be there, looking as lovely as ever. And so the mental torture continues. But you know that this is the right decision, for you both, in the long run. Even though it sucks big time now. We have to persevere because otherwise, you will end up in an on going game of indecision and regret.

It's 6 days after we broke up. I've been flitting between listening to Destiny's child, Adele and Taylor swift.
Today is the 6th day and I've gone for Jay-z. Just to mix it up a bit. '99 problem but a bitch aint one.' etc

Good luck to all you break-er-uppers. It's shit.

Found the really morbid break up piece!

I'm going to publish it because I'm nice like that. So you can all mock my existence and feel better about yourself if you are infact a breakerupper. We all feel the same until they manage to thoroughly piss us off once more.

February.

So, just to get us up to speed. Myself and the blonde bomb shell split up. I did attempt to write a reaaaaaaally depressing, poetic and self deprecating post about in on here just the other week but my laptop wouldn't allow it. Probably for the best as I would literally be dying from the amount of shuddering I would have to do due to the words I managed to type in my warped state.
So, we broke up. I finished him and now the Adele songs don't get my sympathy. Maybe she deserved to be broken up with? Maybe she was needy and crazy and an angry drunk who wouldn't meet your friends? And there we go sympathising with Adele because she's all crying and singing about it. What about him? What if he is a perfectly great guy who deserves better than being moaned about over 'rumours having it' and god knows what else?
I saw him at a club the other night as he had invited me there (he probably told his friends later on that I was an intruder and refused all knowledge of the whole thing) we argued immediately because I bumped into his friend and he escorted me to the x-files. This was apparently a problem. So, I left within 8 minutes of being in the club. We paid £6 to get in...
The next day I returned home to find a picture of myself that he had kindly returned to me. 'It's best you have this' was written on the back. Don't worry, it wasn't anything x-rated just a recent modelling photo he wanted and now doesn't want.
At least it's over right? No more arguing, dreading phone calls, worrying if he is going to bollock me over something or nothing. We did have some good times but they are now tainted with frost.

To lighten up this post, I did have an indoor water fight yesterday! Literally had buckets of water tipped over my head and thrown into my face. INSIDE. It was incredible.

Ta ta for now, I have one of those lecture things you're supposed to be at university for.

Cyaaaaaaaaaa. Byeeeeeeeee.